Healthy Communication and Relationships
In middle school, students are starting to explore who they are and try to find more independence. Friends/Peers start to have more of an influence on them and they start to figure out relationships and love. It is important for them to learn what healthy communication and relationships look like and how to identify what is considered unhealthy.
ANGER
Dealing with anger is one way to help improve communication. When you are upset or angry, it is difficult to keep a "cool head." Many times one says things that are not appropriate or not productive and make things worse in the situation. Anger is controllable and one chooses the actions that he/she takes when angry. Controlling anger is easier to do when recognizing what is making you angry, when you can identify your own physical and psychological cues to anger, and when you have calming strategies in mind for dealing with anger.
Dealing with anger is one way to help improve communication. When you are upset or angry, it is difficult to keep a "cool head." Many times one says things that are not appropriate or not productive and make things worse in the situation. Anger is controllable and one chooses the actions that he/she takes when angry. Controlling anger is easier to do when recognizing what is making you angry, when you can identify your own physical and psychological cues to anger, and when you have calming strategies in mind for dealing with anger.
Physical/Psychological Responses to Anger:
Immediate Calming Strategies Examples:
Later Calming Strategies Examples:
Immediate Calming Strategies Examples:
Later Calming Strategies Examples:
COMMUNICATION
Effective communication is also beneficial to healthy relationships (friends, family, dating). Communication is a skill. No one is a born communicator, but everyone can learn to assert himself or herself while respecting the feelings and beliefs of others.
4 SAFE Skills for Communication:
Stay Calm
Use calming strategies to feel cool and collected.
Ask Questions
Ask honest and open questions to better understand the situation. Don't jump to conclusions. After listening to that person's answer, you may realize the conflict was all a misunderstanding.
Find Out Feelings
Find out how the other person feels about the situation that is causing the disagreement. Express your own feelings -be honest and specific, referring to the situation and what about it upsets you. Use "I" statements when expressing your feelings. Say "I feel (add feeling here) when you (add behavior you don't like) because (add reason for feeling like you do)." For example: "I feel mad when you ignore me because I fell like you don't care."
Exchange Ideas For A Possible Solution
With all of this information, suggest possible solutions. Talk about which ones work best for the two of you.
UNHEALTHY RELATIONSHIPS
Too often, a dating relationship becomes painful and even dangerous before anyone seeks help. Certain feelings and behaviors, however, can alert you to unhealthy and/or abusive relationships. These feelings and behaviors can be called "red flags" that can be seen as warning signs that changes need to be made before things get dangerous.
If you or someone you know is in an abusive relationship, it is important to seek help.
Contact:
School Counselor or SRO
National Teen Dating Abuse Hotline: 1-866-331-9474 or chat online at loveisrespect.org or text "loveis" to 22522
Resources for more information:
That's Not Cool
Love is Respect
If you or someone you know is in an abusive relationship, it is important to seek help.
Contact:
School Counselor or SRO
National Teen Dating Abuse Hotline: 1-866-331-9474 or chat online at loveisrespect.org or text "loveis" to 22522
Resources for more information:
That's Not Cool
Love is Respect
Red Flags for Unhealthy/Abusive Relationships: